Dear Bride-to-Be:
In my articles and lectures, I often refer to wedding rituals and how couples can use old and new "rituals of the heart" to deepen their wedding experience. Whether it's walking slowly down a church aisle or garden path; or wearing special "dress-up" clothes for the ceremonial festivites; or repeating vows to each other (composed from your heart or from ancient scribes), all rituals -- defined as “a set of prescribed behaviors” by author Carol McD. Wallace -- are designed to guide you through these life-changing times that may otherwise be stressful.
Participating in rituals -- designed to slow down and ease the pace of "regular life" -- allows you to express the ideas and feelings of your heart when your busy, “over thinking” mind may be a bit befuddled. What rituals are you using for your wedding ceremony and reception? Choose them from your heart (your inner wisdom) and let the peacefulness they bring just wash over you.
Ritual can bring order out of chaos and help ease the anxieties of the day, creating a space of intimacy and an open expression of love. Trust the ritual process and listen to the quiet within.
Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia
[Photograph: Courtesy of Lisa & Harvey Tipler]
February 15, 2010
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I appreciate the focus on rituals in the wedding. The thing I thought was most important was that couples can select the riuals they use deliberately. It is also important for couples to understand that we construct our relationshps out of rituals from the first meeting. the hello, shake of the hand, the flirt with the twinkle of they eye. People who deliberately select effective rituals (love rituals, forgiveness rituals, reconciliation rituals) for living their married lives together are likely to succeed.
ReplyDelete-Kelley Brigman, PhD, LMFT, author of Marriage: A Simple Guide to Success. www.purplesedgemedia.com