{A Woman's Radiance} Redux!

To celebrate the return of the romantic Outlander series on television this month, I'm repeating a popular post about what it took to make the bride's 18th century gown to literally "glow" in candlelight...as well as a few insights about a woman's glow at any time! Enjoy....

For this 18^th century wedding set in the Scottish Highlands, the costume designer wanted Claire—the bride and heroine of the Outlander series—to literally glow. “I wanted a dress that would be incredible in candlelight,” Terry Dresbach shared. This wedding—and forthcoming marriage and relationship of Claire Beauchamp Randall and Jamie Fraser—was the foundation of the immensely popular Outlander books and subsequent television series, therefore the direction from the show’s creator (and Terry’s husband) was that “this moment needed to be a fairy tale.”

“In the 18^th century, metallic fabrics were made with actual metal woven into the fabrics,” explained Terry in Variety magazine. “When you put [the original costumes] in a room filled with candles, they just glow. They’re quite remarkable.” By incorporating delicate shavings of iridescent mica as well as an old, time-consuming embroidery technique using metal strands, Terry was able to be true to the spirit of the era while also creating something stunning and shimmering for Claire’s “reluctant” wedding ceremony.

Of course as a fashion historian and wedding folklorist, I loved reading about the creative process of designing this gown. But I also write about a bride’s rite-of-passage, her personal inner journey, and her deep desire to be as beautiful as possible on her wedding day! In my 30 or so years working with brides, I find this desire for beauty a universal expression of the feminine spirit, tapping into a woman’s true goddess nature, her radiance.

Reading about the Outlander’s costume designer’s wish for Claire and her gown to glow, I thought of Regena Thomashauer, best-selling author and founder of the School of Womanly Arts in New York City. The heart of Regena’s work encourages women to find and express their true desires, their self-love, their inner and outer goddess, their glow. “Glow creates beauty in women of all ages, all body types, all backgrounds.” And when you glow, you not only want to dress to show it off, but you just naturally attract and inspire what’s beautiful in others.

Is that the reason women are so attracted to the fairy-tale quality of “being a bride”? The masculine power grid of modern culture doesn’t really encourage the rich, deep, loving expression of feminine values, so a woman’s wedding becomes a rather rare opportunity for her to glow; a time for full-tilt-boogie radiance! But I would encourage all women, every day—no matter where you are in your life—to open your heart, to shine your inner light, to choose radiance! ~

Claire and Jamie's candlelit wedding in Outlander
(All images from costume designer Terry Dresbach's blog)

{Vintage Shimmer}

"Costumes of Downton Abbey" Exhibition at Winterthur

Dear Bride-to-Be:
I recently had the pleasure of being guest speaker at the marvelous Winterthur Museum in Delaware during their ongoing "Costumes of Downton Abbey" exhibition. Lady Edith's cream silk wedding dress was a favorite on display....and I included details in my talk about how costume designer Caroline McCall created the elegant vintage design, starting with an antique silk and crystal beaded train.

Caroline said she looked at lots of old photographs and magazines for inspiration for the design of Edith's dress....one gown was that of Mary, the Princess Royal, for her wedding in 1922 at Westminster Abbey. Like many princesses of the time, the column-style, drop-waist gown was silver in color.  I thought you'd enjoy this from Christopher Warwick, author of Two Centuries of Royal Weddings, citing a "shimmering" description from a guest at the 20s wedding:

Princess Mary's gown was silver lamé, veiled with marquisette embroidered in English roses worked with thousands of tiny diamonds and seed pearls in a faint lattice-work design....girdled with a silver cord studded with triple rows of pearls....and from the waist also hung a trail of orange blossom with silver stems.

The train was composed of specially woven white and silver duchess satin, draped with Honiton lace embroidered in baroque pearls, diamonds and silver bullion.

Now your bridal gown may not be such a glistening, silvery confection....nor vintage-inspired....nor one designed just for you (although a princess you may be!) But whatever you wear for your wedding day, include a shimmering open-heart ready to share with all....and all the days thereafter!

Love. Listen. Let go.

...with love from Cornelia

 

Cornelia with Maggie Lidz, Winterthur Estate Historian,
at the entrance of the "Costumes of Downton Abbey" exhibition

ps:  The "Costumes of Downton Abbey" exhibition will be at Winterthur through January 4, 2015. It is not a traveling exhibit....in addition to the costumes, it has videos and images from the show that won't be seen elsewhere....so get yourself there! You don't want to miss it!

{Choices of Your Heart}

Dear Bride-to-Be:

“Wearing a wedding gown is so weird,” a bride was quoted in The Bride Revealed, a book by wedding photographer Leslie Barton. “It’s not like any other dress. I felt so grown-up and elegant in it. At the same time, it felt like a costume. Even during my wedding, when I saw my reflection, I was startled. ‘Who is that?’ It’s such an important transformation, from the usual jeans and T-shirt to a formal wedding gown. I felt it strengthened the commitment, that what I said on this day would be with me for the rest of my life.”

This bride reveals something that you might soon find out for yourself. That your wedding gown, and all the other rituals you use for your wedding—the music, flowers, exchange of rings, even your vows—are all outward expressions of your inner self. They are a reflection of what you hold in your heart and meant to, as this bride shared, “strengthen your commitment” to all you hold dear.

And you thought your wedding dress was only to make you look like a dream! It’s not only a “transformation from jeans to formal gown,” but also a transformation of your heart—deepening your commitment to your best self. Make the things you choose for your wedding, choices of your “big old beautiful open heart!”

Love. Listen. Let go.

....with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Leslie Barton]

{Vintage Inspiration}



Le Petit Echo de la Mode - 1923
from "Head to Toe Fashion Art"


Dear Bride-to-Be:
Ideas for vintage-inspired fashion are all around! From Downton Abbey to Mad Men, there's a pretty vintage vibe availabe to sweep you off your feet! Or as Elle UK magazine says, there's a "wealth of inspiration for modern brides hoping to channel a hint of vintage glamour."

How about vintage with a French twist? The website "Head to Toe Fashion Art" has a lovely gallery of rare bridal prints from 1863 to 1952 where you'll find some old-fashioned charm.

The Victoria and Albert museum in London is a treasure trove of inspirition from the past. There's a wonderful online gallery of wedding gowns, accessories and jewelry as well as a beautiful book showcasing the best of their collection: The Wedding Dress: 300 Years of Bridal Fashions by Edwina Erhman. Then there are a myriad of shops and online spots featuring vintage wedding gowns and bridal accoutrements like the designer and couture items at The Frock.

 

Wherever you find inspiration for your wedding, be sure to inspire your heart! Here's a little exercise: Take several deep, easy soothing breaths and imagine them flowing in 'n out of your heart. Follow your breath and find your center 'til you can ground yourself inside your heart...your hub. Then whatever creative ideas you discover that may "take your breath away," you're always ready to reach out with love.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from  Cornelia

ps: The "Head to Toe Fashion Art" website adds to their gallery as they find beautiful, old wedding prints. Check with them often for a bit of vintage inspiration!

{Bridal Gown as Art}

Dear Bride-To-Be:
Most brides put lots of attention on finding or creating the dress to wear for their wedding. Wearing it makes them feel beautiful...even looking at it makes them feel special!

Since the wedding dress takes such a beloved place in the hearts of brides, there are several ways to be sure that it remains special. And even have it be a work of art to enjoy long after the wedding ends.

Here are some creative ideas by wonderful artists:

Fashion illustrator Anne Underwood can create a lovely pencil, ink & pastel drawing of you in your wedding dress (from your favorite photograph.)

Photographer Dorothy O'Connor re-creates a wedding gown into a beautiful still-life image.

And if you want to preserve your gown yourself, click here for tips from assistant museum curator, Steven Rosengard.

After your wedding is complete -- settling back into your "un-bride" routine as well as adjusting to married life -- can be just as busy as the time planning your wedding. So before you let that lovely gown languish for too long on the back of a chair somewhere, be sure to have it cleaned and put away -- and perhaps even create a precious piece of art out of your memories.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

{Choices of Your Heart}

Dear Bride-to-Be:

“Wearing a wedding gown is so weird,” a bride was quoted in The Bride Revealed, a book by photographer Leslie Barton. “It’s not like any other dress. I felt so grown-up and elegant in it. At the same time, it felt like a costume. Even during my wedding, when I saw my reflection, I was startled. ‘Who is that?’ It’s such an important transformation, from the usual jeans and T-shirt to a formal wedding gown. I felt it strengthened the commitment, that what I said on this day would be with me for the rest of my life.”

This bride reveals something that you might soon find out for yourself. That your wedding gown, and all the other rituals you use for your wedding—the music, flowers, exchange of rings, even your vows—are all outward expressions of your inner self. They are a reflection of what you hold in your heart and meant to, as this bride said, “strengthen your commitment” to all you hold dear.

And you thought your wedding dress was only to make you look like a dream! It’s not only a “transformation from jeans to formal gown,” but also a transformation of your heart—deepening your commitment to your best self. Make the things you choose for your wedding, choices of your heart.

Love. Listen. Let go.

....with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Leslie Barton]

{Veiled in Mystery}

Dear Bride-to-Be:

What has come to be known as a “bridal veil” in European-American heritage has its own unique story, borrowing the best from both Eastern and Western cultures. From Eastern tradition, you inherit a sense of being veiled as capturing a meditative space for your own private reverie. The Western lineage of the veil takes inspiration from the prestige and grandeur of past traditions from the royal courts. Together they create an elegant heritage and a pensive beauty for today's brides.

Whether you are aware of this legacy, or whether you wear a bridal veil or not, you are stepping into the past touched by women of the ages, offering a bit of themselves to your life. Open your heart and let that womanly support of strength and mystery in!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Kimberly Sayre & Shannon Stellmacher for Shannon Stellmacher Photography]

{Your Fabled Dress}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
There is a great deal of romance and juicy energy around the fabled “wedding dress.” These costumes with a past have become mythical creatures, described as “gowns of ritual” by historian Carol McD. Wallace in her book All Dressed in White. Wedding dresses—whether you wear something old or something new—connect women in an echoing sisterly heritage.

Share with a girlfriend or aunt or your seamstress or any woman in your life how wearing your wedding dress makes/made you feel. Soak in feeling feminine and luscious and gorgeous in your own eyes. Enjoy “playing dress-up” in your princess gown and take that womanliness into “regular life” so you can draw from that delight—especially on one of those “frumpy” feeling days!

Slow down during your wedding planning time and wedding day. Savor it. Breathe deeply and easily into your heart center and just hang out there for a bit. And in this soft and sweet place, remember the “feeling beautiful” feeling and carry it with you no matter what you are wearing.

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

[Photograph by Sarah Merians and Company]

{Let's Talk About Those Strapless Dresses!}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
One of the things I liked about the recent royal wedding (and there were many features I adored) was that the lovely Kate Middleton did not wear a strapless dress! Now, before you get your noses out of joint, all you strapless gown lovers, hear me out!

I wrote a long article years ago offering some tips with things a bride could do and/or remember so she looked fabulous all day or evening for her wedding when wearing a strapless style gown—if I couldn’t talk her out of  wearing one! I realized that when it came to selecting one’s wedding gown, it was hard not to get carried away with some starry-eyed, romantic notions that sometime blur a bride’s vision. For instance, when you’re trying on dresses, you’re not always thinking about practical considerations, like how it will “move” on you (or not move on you); or how revealing it is (the good, the bad, and the unflattering).

Therefore, if you want to get some friendly “360 degrees” (a view you can’t see yourself—even in a three-way mirror!) of advice on wearing a strapless dress because you may not know how to move in one (trust me, it’s different from other styles!) ... or you may not realize some things not to do so you can always look graceful and beautiful—you just may want to read the article, Consider Not Wearing a Strapless Dress, Unless... (Because sometimes a more informed bride is a more beautiful bride!) 

So ladies—let’s talk about those strapless dresses!

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

[Photographs: Jason Hudson]

{Wedding Guest of Honor}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Weddings are undeniably about relationships—the relationship of the bride and groom, the couple with their family and friends, the relationship between the two families coming together—even including the bride’s relationship with her special dress.
This is a unique relationship, intriguing to artists and scholars alike, that has been written about over and over through the years. The connection of a bride to her gown is at times poignant, wistful, intimate, joyful—and many times one that can get a bit over-the-top!

California wedding photographer Leslie Barton remarked: “It seems to me the gown is really the guest of honor. It is treated with a delicacy and respect that few humans experience.”

A gentle reminder, dear bride: Love your dress; treasure how it makes you feel, even feel like a princess; celebrate your day; honor your heritage; and treat all of your wedding guests as the “guest of honor”! You’ll feel even more beautiful....

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photographs: top, Josie Miner and bottom, Jason Hudson]

{Celebrities, Wedding Gowns & You}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
There was a lot of attention on celebrity weddings this past weekend and the custom-made couture gowns the brides wore.

The marriage of super model Kate Moss -- wearing a shimmering, slim, sleeveless, rhinestone-covered gown -- brought friends, family and lots of famous folks to Southrop, England for the ceremony. Her John Galliano created, floor-length (and rather sheer) dress was accessorized by a vintage-style lace veil worn over her long, loose wavy hair.

Then there was the beautiful former Olympic swimmer, Charlene Wittstock, who became a princess when she married Prince Albert II in fabled Monaco wearing a stunning off-the-shoulder Armani gown "cut from 130 metres of duchesse silk and studded with 40,000 crystals." The bride wore her blonde hair pulled back, sleek and held in place with dazzling diamonds.

You may be wearing something less grand for your wedding, but no less special. Your gown may be borrowed from a friend, it may be re-designed from your mother's gown or something designed just for you, or it may be your brand-new, off-the-rack dream dress! And it may not even be a dress. You may be wearing silky pants, a suit, a vintage kimono, or blue jeans!

Whatever you wear, wear it with a big celebrity smile! Wear it and feel like a princess! Wear it and open your heart and put your attention on how beautiful everyone else looks looking at you!

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

{Your Wedding Crown}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Even if your wedding gown is new, it has roots in the past. Today’s bridal “ball gown” styles borrow from thousands of years of fashion design. So you may be wearing a style of gown inspired from something worn by a queen or empress or even a goddess.

Feeling “regal” as a bride is part of your natural inheritance. No wonder that tiaras—elegance borrowed from another time—remain a favorite bridal headpiece today. Throughout history, there have been wedding ceremonies that “crown” the bride and groom, like in the Russian or Greek Orthodox services, symbolizing the “royal” blessings of their wedding day. Undeniably, your wedding costume brings out a bit of princess fantasy—like a little girl playing “dress up”—and combines it with something grown-up and royal like the beautiful goddess you are!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Laurie Lambrecht]

{Feeling Beautiful Down to Your Toes}

Dear Bride-To-Be:
As you may know, it’s a rather recent custom—in the world of costume history—for brides to have new dress for their wedding. I have a collection of old wedding photographs from the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries of brides wearing their “best dress,” usually a dark color (it was practical, appropriate for mourning, and perhaps the only fabric available!)

So to make their dark outfit more festive and “bridal,” some brides attached creame ribbon and lace and wax orange blossom rosettes to their skirt and wore fresh flowers or a crown of wax orange blossoms in their hair with some sort of veil attached. The veil seemed to declare, “I’m a bride!”

What are you wearing as part of your “bridal costume” that declares something really special for you—that just makes you tingle? Maybe it’s the gown itself—it makes you feel like a fairy princess; or perhaps family heirloom earrings that you admired as a little girl; or your great-grandmother’s handmade lace veil purchased on her “grand tour” of Europe; or possibly it’s just the giddiest pink pumps ever!
 

Whatever it is—wear it with joie de vie delight—feel beautiful down to your toes—and let it declare to the world not only “I’m a bride”—but especially “I’m a goddess!”


Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia


[Top Photograph: Collection of the Author;
Bottom Photograph: Jason Hudson]

{Be a Goddess for a Lifetime}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
The tradition of the white wedding gown is neither universal, nor is it very old. Queen Victoria of England, at her wedding in 1840, was not the first bride to wear white, but her grand influence set the “bridal white” fashion in motion . . . and the rest is history.

Wearing white has always had a ceremonial and regal quality—for whatever occasion—taking on a kind of radiance. In my costume history research exploring goddess mythology, I find a heritage of shimmering white gowns worn by ancient luminous deities who embodied the female essence of beauty, strength, and love. Goddesses all! Perhaps then, as a bride, you are indeed the “epiphany of the goddess.” Hmmm . . . try that on for a moment. (Take a long, slow breath deep into your body and just imagine how it would feel to be a Goddess.) Then allow that goddess awareness to draw you closer to your own feminine nature and breathe in its soulful beauty.

Just know that whatever you wear for your wedding—a white gown, a colorful kimono, or a pair of jeans—you carry something of the goddess spirit with you! Your ritual costume wraps you in a bit of “royal lineage” that now simply becomes a part of who you are. As I’ve told brides for years, Don’t settle for being a “princess for a day”—be a “goddess for a lifetime.”

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Kristin Spencer]

{Standing On Solid Ground}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Our fascination with shoes started long before designer labels or “Sex and the City.” Shoes—for obvious reasons—were first created for protective covering but then evolved into status symbols (sometimes rather foreboding ones) as well as objects of beauty and sexual allure.

Historians tell us that the symbolism of footwear in connection with marriage and luck dates back to antiquity. An old custom in China, tossing the bride’s red shoes from a roof, ensured the couple’s happiness; the ancient Inca Indians of Peru exchanged sandals to seal the marriage deal. In more recent history, perhaps when your grandparents or their parents married, couples rode away in a car with shoes tied onto the bumper as a sign that prosperity would follow them!

Whatever shoes you wear for your wedding—or even if you go barefoot—be sure that you’re “standing on solid ground” as far as your heart is concerned! Keep checking in with yourself while you are planning your wedding to be sure that your focus is on your relationship and that your attention hasn’t gotten lost in the busyness of wedding “things.” (Like what shoes look the best with your dress!)

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Kristin Spencer]

{Regal Spirit}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Have you selected your wedding gown yet? Are you wearing a tiara or special headpiece in your  hair? When you’re all dressed up in your bridal costume, do you feel like a beautiful goddess...or a regal princess...or something out of a fairy tale...or simply deliciously feminine through ’n through...or perhaps strangely “not you”...?

My friend Adele Azar-Rucquoi, who wore no wedding gown nor crown but a white silky blouse and flowing pants with a wide-brim straw hat, was a joyful bride at fifty-nine and the essence of the regalness of spirit. Walking down the aisle toward her beloved, she shares this remembrance in her book for women, Money as Sacrament: “One by one I made eye contact with my friends, grinning until my face hurt. Never have I seen them from so regal a place!”

Perhaps it’s not what you wear on your wedding day but how you wear it. So wear it well, you beautiful Goddess Bride! Allow yourself to feel your regal femininity down to your toes, taking pleasure in your unique feminine ways of being compassionate, kind, and strong. And remember, a Goddess Bride always keeps her heart open.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Courtesy of the University of South Alabama Library]

{Something Borrowed from the Heart}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Women have a long lineage of sharing their precious garments, textiles, and jewelry—as well as things of the heart—with other women to mark a special occasion, especially for weddings. And many times the treasure shared becomes the bride's “something borrowed.”

Sometimes what is offered is more of a symbol, more ephemeral, yet deeply personal and heartfelt. Carol McD. Wallace recounts in her book All Dressed in White: “Each of the women who worked on Princess Elizabeth of England’s wedding gown embroidered a strand of her own hair into the gown, as a way of embodying her good wishes for the princess bride.” There is no limit to how we can share our love.

As you reach out to a future bride to keep the loving connection of beauty and generosity going, your friendship and a hug may be the best “something borrowed” of all!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Courtesy of Getty Images]

{The Woman Revealed}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
“ ‘My veil was magical. And so simple. Just one layer of tulle about six feet long. It floated in the wind as I walked down the aisle,’ ” a bride expresses in the charming book The Bride Revealed. When I had my bridal art-to-wear store years ago, I encouraged a bride to wear a veil—it seemed to complete the ritual of her costume, and I knew she would love how it made her feel.

I also liked how wearing a veil created a rather ethereal quality, bringing a lovely stillness to the bride’s presence, supporting her inner transformation. As I dressed and fitted brides in the intimacy of my shop, I shared this impression: Imagine the bridal veil as representing the mystery of womanhood. Wrapped in a gossamer cloud, the veil reveals the woman!

Then some enchantment would always follow. As I attached a veil to the headpiece in the bride’s hair, I watched closely as she turned to her image in the mirror. Her eyes widened, her face softened, her heart opened and then a little gasp as she looked at her reflection, like some long lost recognition remembered.

What would you like revealed during this rather mysterious and womanly rite-of-passage you are moving through? It’s a journey into a deeper part of your true self . . . just imagine the possibilities to be “unconcealed.” Look inside to your awareness. Your heart’s desire is waiting to speak to you.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph by David Willems]

{Your Wedding Crown}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Even if your wedding gown is new, it has roots in the past. Today’s bridal “ball gown” styles borrow from thousands of years of fashion design. So you may be wearing a style of gown inspired from something worn by a queen or empress or even a goddess.

Feeling “regal” as a bride is part of your natural inheritance. No wonder that tiaras—elegance borrowed from another time—remain a favorite bridal headpiece today. Throughout history, there have been wedding ceremonies that “crown” the bride and groom, like in the Russian or Greek Orthodox services, symbolizing the “royal” blessings of their wedding day. Undeniably, your wedding costume brings out a bit of princess fantasy—like a little girl playing “dress up”—and combines it with something grown-up and royal like the beautiful goddess you are!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Laurie Lambrecht]

{Treasured Relationships}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
A bridal gown not only reflects a woman’s personal style, but it also speaks eloquently of families and communities, relationship and history. As a treasured family inheritance, bridal attire is saved to share with future generations: from bits of lace and ribbon to the entire wedding ensemble. (Are you wearing something for your wedding that is a valued family heirloom?)

Through the years, I have visited dozens of popular exhibitions at museums around the world featuring bridal costumes and accessories, revealing an anthropologist-like view into the heart of a particular community. At times during my visits, it’s as though I can feel the relationships infused in the wedding garments: mother-daughter, daughter-father, friend to friend, beloved to beloved, woman to her culture. The universal appeal of these exhibits shows how bridal paraphernalia provides pleasure and memories, contributing to people’s lives long after the initial wearing, long beyond the ceremony’s end.

Relationships are also part of our “treasured inheritance,” and they come in all shapes and sizes: some easy to embrace and other relationships in need of a bit of “mending.” Wedding planning time—the scheduling, the parties, even the wedding day itself—is a perfect opportunity to tend to that mending! Reach out . . . love, listen, forgive, and let go.

...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Collection of author]