{Truly Divine}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
As you are choosing flowers for your wedding, remember that the sense of smell is considered “the most ancient and magical sense, acting as a sort of sensual medium between heaven and earth,” according to author Christopher Bamford. “A scent or perfume was thought to express the inner essence or spiritual nature of a thing,” he added. Therefore using fragrant flowers for your wedding is like sharing something truly divine!

Use your wedding planning time to express your inner essence. When you feel yourself getting stressed or when your “to do” list keeps getting longer, pause…take a quiet moment for yourself and do this little exercise:

• Close your eyes and take several slow, deep breaths ... putting your attention within, gently and slowly breathe in and out until you find your center.
• Once feeling more centered, now imagine roots from the bottoms of your feet sinking deep into the Earth, grounding you.
• With this sense of feeling more centered and grounded, imagine your heart opening ... and opening even wider with each easy, deep breath.

Now in every gesture and expression you offer to others, give the most generous and grateful version of you—that’s your inner essence! Follow the lead of those fragrant flowers: Don't be stingy with your essence...spritz everyone you meet today with something divine! A heartfelt bit of you....

Love. Listen. Let go...
...with love from Cornelia

[Photography: Daniel Sheenan]

{You Don't Have To Be Someone Else}

 

Dear Bride-to-Be:
"Women are having more fun with fashion in general...and they're bringing that spirit to their weddings," writes a Martha Stewart Weddings blog post called Bridesmaid Dress 101. I love that women are playing with choices and infusing their creativity, passion and good taste into their wedding celebration. "You don't have to become someone else (read more traditional than you are) for that one day," advises designer Peter Som.

And I really like how the designer shares with brides about selecting dresses for their attendants, "Seven Tips for Dressing Your Wedding Party." Each tip is about fashion and looking more beautiful, yet it's wrapped in a bit of wise counsel inspiring a beautifully intuitive life:

• Don't Go Changing
• Please Yourself
• Turn the Lights On (or Off)
• Accessorize Wisely
• Be Sensitive to the Season
• Remember, Prints Have Their Limits
• Consult Mother Nature

I found in these ideas a reminder that everything in life can be a message for your spirit...if you just look beyond the surface and see into the heart of the matter. Now that's really beautiful!

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia



[Photographs: Martha Stewart Weddings]

{Your Wedding Bouquet, Forever}

 

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Flowers are "the poet's darling" as William Wordsworth shared ... and simply a must for weddings, yes? Whether it's a bunch of hand-picked wildflowers from a meadow or a finely-crafted formal bouquet -- flowers and brides and weddings make a divine combination!

And now your wedding flowers can be "forever." My artist friend, Pat Fiorello, will paint a glorious version of your bouquet ... then you will have a memorable piece of art forever! As Pat explains: "No matter if your style is soft and romantic or bold and dramatic, an original painting of your wedding bouquet will keep the memories of your special day available to you after the real flowers are gone."

Like love, as another poet writes, a flower "yearns to be carried away." Hmmmm ... in our bustling, busy world, aren't we blessed to have inspired poets and artists remind us how to cherish love and the beauty of flowers deep in our hearts!

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

 

Click here to read all about Pat and her work in watercolor and oils.

{A Handkerchief for Your Wedding} Part Three: "Soft Sighs & Deep Breaths"

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Handkerchiefs and weddings—along with the likes of languid moments, love and courtship, soft sighs, and “taking one’s breath away”—have a long poetic history together. And if you were lucky enough to have a close relation skilled with a needle (and many people did up until the middle of last century), then you’d have your own special handmade wedding handkerchief to sigh over. Perhaps made from near translucent Belgium linen or fine cotton from Portugal with a lush border of rose point bobbin lace for her and for him, a spacious, white lawn handkerchief with hand-rolled edges and embroidered with his initials.
 
Beautifully fetching handkerchiefs may evoke a more leisurely era as well as their costumed weddings; however, there’s a romantic melodrama that spins around weddings of any era. Weddings of the past and present are like a microcosmic slice of real life magnified and when planning a wedding (no matter how small or quickly assembled—even if it’s “Let’s hurry over to the courthouse!”), emotions swirl and time seems to speed up and slow down all at the same time. In our hurry-up world, whatever the occasion, maybe we need to stop and sigh every now and then. Oh, not for any melancholia—but just to enjoy the beautiful, take-your-breath-away blessing that life is.

When I had my bridal shop years ago, to help my customers ease the pace, relax into their bodies, and enjoy their rite-of-passage ahead, I would tell stories taken from wedding folklore, adding my own twists with a bit of goddess legend and mystical mythology woven in. I didn’t wave a hanky for dramatic effect, but I did take slow, unhurried breaths—with exhales not unlike a sigh—and soon my listeners were breathing deeper as well; they became more relaxed, even more sympathetic to mother or daughter or partner or whomever appeared as the source of their anxiety. Sometimes we miss life’s magic if we don’t slow down (letting go of the drama) and take a deep, long, easy breath.

So keep a pretty handkerchief handy—even if just as a reminder to take a few soft, languid moments to look within and refresh, relax and regroup.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Handkerchief images: Karen Augusta]

{A Handkerchief for Your Wedding} Part Two: "Lavender Tinged"

Dear Bride-to-Be:
A pretty vintage handkerchief (white-on-white or perhaps with a smidgen of pastel color) is my favorite bridal present to give—something personal, feminine and intimate, yet immensely practical. Sometimes I’ll slip back to the bride’s dressing area the day of the wedding and give her a hanky gift, ensuring she doesn’t go down the aisle without it. (I’ve also been known to whip out my own vintage hanky from my handbag and give it to the bride or groom when no other is available!)

Of course handkerchiefs for brides or grooms are more than just useful for tears and sniffles. They can be a handy way to bring a bit of ease into your bustling wedding day with an old-fashioned yet clever use of aromatherapy. For instance, lavender is very calming. (And did you know that when you’re calm and more relaxed, you’re more present to love?)

You can lavender-scent your wedding day handkerchief by placing it (or them) in a box or wrapped in tissue with some sprigs of dried lavender a few days before the wedding. Or as you’re leaving for your ceremony, dab a tiny drop of lavender essential oil on a corner of your handkerchief so you’ll get a soothing whiff each time you pat your nose. (Even keep a small vial of lavender oil in your bridal purse or pocket for a little calming “hanky refresher” during your wedding festivities.)

So instead of being distracted by nerves or “drippy” moments on your wedding day, be “hanky prepared” and you’ll be able to keep your attention on love...on what’s in your heart...on each other!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: David Willems]

{A Handkerchief for Your Wedding} Part One: "Keepsake Vows"

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Are you writing your own vows or perhaps rewriting some beautiful old ceremonial text, like from The Book of Common Prayer? The words spoken at a wedding carry more than just promises and declarations, they carry the rhythm and heartbeat of your deeper self. (Don’t dismiss their potential power by not giving them thoughtful consideration.)

Here’s a lovely idea that requires you to put attention on your vows early on. In arrangements made long before your ceremony, calligrapher Anne Elser, using her graceful script, will write your vows in permanent paint on a handkerchief—yours or ones from her vintage collection—so you’ll truly carry the words of your heart with you down the aisle. And, if needed, you’ll have a little “I Do” assistance at the altar as well as a beautiful keepsake.

For those of you who have read my book, The Bride's Ritual Guide: Look Inside to Find Yourself, (or remember my shop from years ago) you’ll know that handkerchiefs—especially fine vintage and antique ones—are dear to me. And I consider a charmingly serviceable hanky a must for every bride (and groom) to carry on their wedding day (for tears, runny noses, moist brows, dewy palms—you get the picture!) So this post begins a new series featuring the practical yet mysterious handkerchief. Revisit here often for bits of folklore that will tickle your heart (and maybe learn a handy-hanky tip or two.)

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

ps: Tune in for “hanky installment” Part Two coming soon!

[Photographs: (top) Josie Miner; (bottom) Martha Stewart Weddings]