{Flowers and Their Meanings}

Dear Bride-to-Be: 
Brides and the language of flowers have a romantic and mystical heritage. Through the ages, sentimental folks assigned meanings to flowers and herbs according to their innate nature—and a language was created.

Bridal folklore throughout history, inspired by goddess mythology, tells of maidens entwining creamy white, aromatic orange blossoms into a bridal wreath for their hair, to ensure fertility; or carrying a bunch of sweet smelling white lilacs, representing innocence; or tucking fragrant herbs into their bouquets, rosemary for remembrance and dill, believed to provoke lust. Both herbs were also eaten for their supposed powers!

So whatever flowers you are carrying or wearing or displaying at your wedding, consider their folklore and mystery and romance (like from Kate Greenaway’s Language of Flowers)—because sometimes knowing the ancient story of something, especially flowers, opens up some “fragrant” yummy-ness in the present...perhaps even opening your heart to give and receive more tenderness!

Love. Listen. Let go.

.....with love from Cornelia

ps: This is an excerpt from my latest book, The End of the Fairy-Tale Bride {Volume One} For Better or Worse, How Princess Diana Rescued the Great White Wedding. Enjoy....

{Aromatherapy-Wise Bride}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Your time of being a bride should be a dreamy time filled with love! However, if you're doing most of the wedding planning and organizing yourself, it can get a bit stressful, yes? So how can you have the best of all worlds: Stay “full of love, ease and creativity” while planning a wedding from your heart....?

Here are bits of aromatherapy wisdom to get your creative juices flowing:

•     “Lightly spritz wedding invitations and love letters with tea rose or jasmine scents…it helps send love around the world.”

•     “Put a few drops of essential oil on an unscented dryer sheet with your bed linens…lavender pillowcases call sweet dreams close….love follows the scent of rose. Choose either fragrance for a dreamy rest.”

•     “Add a couple of drops of relaxing lavender essential oil onto a practical (washable) white linen handkerchief to carry on your wedding day. Then as you dab at tears (his or yours), the scent brings sweet calm.”

Be an “aromatherapy-wise” bride and enjoy your fragrantly-creative-planning-time and a love-scented wedding day!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photograph: Ian Grant]

{Fragrance of the Heart} Redux

[In honor my bridal guide book signing at the Joy Garden Tour this month in the beautiful mountain village of Cashiers, NC, I'm re-posting this "flowery" message....enjoy!]

 

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Planning a wedding is more than just organizing people, places and things! It's a life changing rite-of-passage of your deeper self, an opportunity to discover something of your inner most essence and share that with your beloved.

No wonder that through the ages, fragrance and essential oils—the extracted essence of aromatic plants—were part of a bride's wedding preparations. Using aromatherapy was a way to assist the bride to tap into her own inner essence and bring the magic of nature into the celebration! A bride would be “anointed” with fragrant, soothing essential oils—so she was then wearing the heart of a flower.

Aromatherapists tell us that the inherent beauty and harmony of nature is exemplified in essential oils. They say that using natural fragrance encourages the link between the right and left sides of the brain, connecting how we feel to how we think.

Aromatherapy consultants Joan Clark and Michael Scholes teach that this is the first step to linking the body and mind, the heart and brain, even creating a balance between the female and male energies.

“It is through these realizations,” the experts explain, “that we start to heal our hearts, learn how to communicate our innermost feelings and to express compassion and the ultimate lesson—the ability to forgive.”    

Ahhh. Discovering the fragrance of the heart through essential oils.What a wonderful way to plan a wedding....a perfect way to be the bride you want to be....a loving way to begin a spiritual partnership!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

[Photographs: Courtesy of Little Winter Bride and Drew Newman]

{The Language of Flowers}

Dear Bride-to-Be:

I thought you'd enjoy this reprint of my article, The Language of Flowers, published in the summer issue of SEASON magazine.

..........................................................................................................

 

Bridal folklore throughout history, inspired by goddess mythology, tells of maidens entwining creamy white, aromatic orange blossoms into a bridal wreath for their hair, to ensure fertility; or carrying a bunch of sweet smelling white lilacs, representing innocence; or tucking fragrant herbs into their bouquets, rosemary for remembrance and dill, believed to provoke lust. (Both herbs were also eaten for their supposed powers!)

 

Along came the French, picking up where the ancient Persians left off by assigning meanings to flowers and herbs, and in 1819 published Le Langage des Fleurs. The etiquette-driven Victorians, as passionate as they were sentimental about flowers, followed suit. With so many rules and restrictions about what was proper to say to whom—and outright flirtations certainly prohibited—they adopted the romance-filled language of flowers, creating their own dictionary-like books, lyrically illustrated, to help sort it all out.

 

This romantic language was perfect for weddings. Many brides, including royal ones, get a bit sentimental when it comes to their wedding bouquet. Queen Victoria carried a nosegay of snowdrops, representing friendship (they were her beloved Albert’s favorite flower); and Grace Kelly, after much thought, selected lilies of the valley as her simple wedding bouquet, meaning return of happiness. And of course Kate Middleton included blooms of Sweet William, signifying gallantry.

 

During the golden-age of movies, whatever the royalty-like brides of old Hollywood loved, the rest of America did as well—and they loved orchids! Especially huge, lush cattleya varieties that, if truth be told, were overtly sexual. Although a “language of flowers” book might say the orchid represents beauty and refinement, Susan Orlean, author of The Orchid Thief, called it “the sexiest flower on the planet.” So no matter what some whimsical Victorian floriography says (or what post-war brides and their mothers pretended), an orchid’s real language was passionate, sensual, even erotic.

Yet, ironically, as was the fashion, a large opulent orchid sat on top of a bride’s small, white bible; or was attached innocently to her fur or satin muff; or worn as an oversized wedding corsage. Orchids were also popular in the center of big, boisterous bridal bouquets, like eighteen-year-old Elizabeth Taylor carried for her first wedding in 1950, right before the premiere of Father of the Bride with Spencer Tracey. (She didn’t carry orchids in all of her eight weddings, but Goddess Liz knew her way ‘round passion so she included them often!)                        

 

Needless to say, the language of flowers could be confusing: their “meanings” changed because of fashion or locale or color; or with what other blossom it was combined. No wonder tussie-mussies and nosegays—a style of mixing specific herbs and flowers—became so popular in the Victorian era (and were forerunners of the modern bridal bouquet.) Since these “talking bouquets” said the sweet-nothings for you, gentlemen suitors carefully chose their flower combinations, assuring the appropriate message be delivered to their sweetheart. (Plus one did not want the nosegay intended for tonight’s dinner hostess mixed up with last night’s paramour, etcetera.)

 

However, if your flower choices for a wedding bouquet don’t match up as you’d like with the messages in a Language of Flowers book, then just assign them your own romantic meanings and I’m certain the flower goddesses will bless you! ~

 

 

 
[This is a reprint of my article published in the summer issue of SEASON magazine. See page 74.]

{Royal Bouquets}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
There is always a bit of mystery surrounding a wedding, yes? What's her dress going to look like? What are the bridesmaids wearing? What flowers did the bride select for her bouquet? All these choices are part of the magic of the ritual of "ceremony." Maybe you're at a stage in your wedding planning that all these decisions are still a mystery!

I've been amazed that as much media attention on the upcoming royal wedding as there is, that Kate has been able to keep as many things secret as she has! Although we don't know (unless you're reading this "after" the wedding) the flowers she's selected for her bouquet (the experts say they'll be white & creamy), but there's one thing that's not a mystery about her bridal bouquet.

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All royal British brides (or brides who have married British royalty) since Queen Victoria's wedding have included a sprig of the folkloric shrub myrtle. And not just a sprig from any ole myrtle bush, but from the "royal myrtles" at Fulham Palace gardens. There are four famous bushes at the east end of the palace, facing the gardens, that grew from cuttings, as the story goes, from Victoria's own bouquet! And all royal bouquets of British brides since -- including the lovely Kate's -- have included a sprig or two of the royal myrtles.

The fragrant Myrtus communis  -- with its petite waxy green leaves and delicate creamy white "eye lash" blossoms -- has a mythological history. The tender perennial is associated with both the Greek goddess Aphrodite and the Roman goddess Venus -- the goddesses of love, beauty and laughter. Through the ages, this legendary botanical has symbolized love and desire, marriage and fidelity, good luck and abundance.

Although you may not be able to have a sprig of myrtle from royal bushes growing in a palace garden, but your bouquet deserves a bit of mythological magic! So include a sprig of myrtle in your bouquet and become a legendary bride!

Love. Listen. Let go.
....with love from Cornelia

ps: You can read more about the "royal myrtles" in a reprint of an article I wrote, "The Legend of the Royal Myrtles." I posted it on a blog page at my new upcoming books' companion blog, The End of the Fairy-Tale Bride. Enjoy!

[Bridal Photograph: David Willems]

{Natural & Tender Does It}

Dear Bride-to-Be: 
Don’t be a “stinky” bride! Many people are sensitive to strong scents and commercial perfumes made with solvents and petroleum products. So during this blog series, “brides, weddings & aromatherapy,” when I’ve been talking about fragrances and scents, I am not suggesting the use of those types of artificial products.

But most people are not allergic to “natural aromas.” So be thoughtful, light and natural in your fragrance choices used for your wedding celebration....from the perfume that you wear to the candles used at the reception.   

Aromatherapy—the use of essences of aromatic plants and flowers—is an art that puts us in touch with the subtle and delicate aspects of Mother Nature and in so doing, teaches us to be tender with each other. What a beautiful wedding gift to offer the world in need of a little more tenderness. In fact, your wedding is a gift to all the guests present...allow its essence to be a naturally fragrant way to share the love!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from  Cornelia

ps: This completes the series “brides, weddings & aromatherapy” ... (It began with the post on November 3, 2010 if you want to check the archives for fragrant and relaxing tips and inspirations.) Stay tuned for an exciting announcement in the post next Wednesday!

[Photograph: Kristin Spencer]

{Aromatherapy Wisdom}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Your time of being a bride should be a dreamy time filled with love! However, if you're doing most of the wedding planning and organizing yourself, it can get a bit stressful, yes? So how can you have the best of all worlds: Stay “full of love, ease and creativity” while planning a wedding from your heart....?

Here are bits of aromatherapy wisdom to get your creative juices flowing:

•     “Lightly spritz wedding invitations and love letters with tea rose or jasmine…it helps send love around the world.”

•     “Put a few drops of essential oil on an unscented dryer sheet with your bed linens…lavender pillowcases call sweet dreams close….love follows the scent of rose. Choose either fragrance for a dreamy rest.”

•     “Add a couple of drops of relaxing lavender essential oil onto a practical (washable) white linen handkerchief to carry on your wedding day. Then as you dab at tears (his or yours), the scent brings sweet calm.”

Be an “aromatherapy-wise” bride and enjoy your fragrantly creative planning time and wedding day! (Check here for more aromatic ideas....)

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: the “aromatherapy, weddings & brides” series continues through February...enjoy!

[Photograph: Ian Grant]

{Dreamy Lavender Bride}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
You know that getting rest -- like a good night's sleep -- is important during the busy time of wedding planning, yes? Here are some "dreamy suggestions" for using lavender essential oil from aromatherapy consultant friends of mine:

•    To support a restful sleep, put some flower petals in a pretty dish on your night table and sprinkle a few drops of lavender essential oil on the petals for a soothing way to enter your dreams. (Perhaps use petals that are fading from a special bouquet of flowers you received!)

•    Scent your bed linens with lavender for a relaxing sleep.

•    Do you use an eye mask for sleeping? Put a few drops of lavender essential oil on the mask (on the side away from your eyes) to support a peaceful night’s rest.

Taking care of yourself is the most important item to have on your "wedding planning to-do list" -- don't leave yourself out!! Have various relaxation practices (light exercise; meditative breaks; walks in nature; burn lavender scented candles while reading; breathe deeply and slowly) be part of your daily routine. Be creative, be gentle, be natural (use aromatherapy fragrances, not artificial stuff*), be aware that real beauty comes from the inside, and be a dreamy bride....

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps:*Mountain Rose Herbs is one of my favorite essential oil sources because of their commitment to quality certified organic products!
pps: More from the series of "aromatherapy, brides and weddings" continues next Wednesday! Tune in...

[Photograph: Kristin Spencer]

{The Language of Flowers}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Brides and the language of flowers have a romantic and mystical history. Through the ages, romantics assigned meaning to flowers and herbs according to their innate nature—and a language was created!

Bridal folklore tells of maidens entwining creamy white, aromatic orange blossoms into a bridal wreath for their hair, to ensure fertility; or carrying a bunch of sweet smelling white lilacs, representing innocence; or tucking fragrant herbs into their bouquets, rosemary for remembrance and dill, believed to provoke lust. (And both herbs were often eaten for their supposed powers!)

Queen Victoria carried a nosegay of snowdrops, representing friendship (they were her beloved Albert’s favorite flower); and Princess Grace, after much thought, selected lilies-of-the-valley for her wedding bouquet, one of the many delicate flowers meaning purity.

Former Brides magazine editor-in-chief, Barbara Tober, tells us that the sentimental Victorians of the 19th century had a custom of arranging a bouquet of flowers and herbs “to spell out the groom’s name (baby’s breath, irises, limonium, and lilies for B-I-L-L.”) The little book, The Language of Flowers, is a reproduction of a Victorian’s floral inspiration that will help you create your own romantic language in flowers!

However, don’t wait for your wedding day. Be inspired, with or without flowers, to speak a language of love and tenderness right this very moment!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: To continue enjoying this series of "brides, weddings, aromatherapy" posts, join us here next Wednesday! (And by-the-way, if you’ve missed any posts, the series began on November 3, 2010.)

[Photograph: Matt Hakola]

{Truly Divine!}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
As you are choosing flowers for your wedding, remember that the sense of smell is considered “the most ancient and magical sense, acting as a sort of sensual medium between heaven and earth,” according to author Christopher Bamford. “A scent or perfume was thought to express the inner essence or spiritual nature of a thing.”  Therefore using fragrant flowers for your wedding is like sharing something truly divine!

Use your wedding planning time to express your inner essence. When you feel yourself getting stressed or when your “to do” list keeps getting longer, pause…

• Now take several slow, deep breaths ... easy, slowly breathe until you find your center.
• Imagine roots from the bottoms of your feet sinking deep into the Earth, grounding you.
• And now in every gesture and expression you offer to others, give the most generous and grateful version of you. 

That’s your inner essence! Don't be stingy with it...spritz everyone you meet today with something divine! A little bit of you....

Love. Listen. Let go...
...with love from Cornelia

ps: This series of "aromatherapy, brides, and weddings" continues next week...it'll be divine!

[Photography: Daniel Sheenan]

{Goddess of Love}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
According to goddess legends, the rose is the flower of Venus, known as the Goddess of Love in Greek mythology. No wonder roses are a wedding favorite. But don’t wait for your wedding day to surround yourself with flowers ... treat yourself now! Aromatherapy experts remind us that the scent of the rose is relaxing—a perfect choice as a fragrant bouquet or single bloom to keep at your desk or in your bedroom. Enjoy and breathe deeply....

 As a bride, you step into your own goddess legend—so start practicing how to keep your heart open and full of love. Try this "rose relaxation" now:
As you take three deep, slow breaths—allowing your breath to gently move your chest up and down, following its flow in and out—relax your shoulders...soften your eyes...let go of where you're holding any tension...continue to breathe deeply...and imagine your heart opening...opening. Then inhale the scent of roses (even it’s only in your imagination) and breathe in the soothing, heart-full fragrance of the love goddess....

Of course you can share your love goddess ways with your wedding guests and have roses all around...or use fresh rose petals lining the aisle or for your guests to toss as happy wishes. I love this "wedding rose" story from Barbara Tober, former editor-in-chief of Bride’s magazine: “One couple left their ceremony under a shower of petals from all the roses he had sent her during their courtship, lovingly saved.”  (If you save rose petals for tossing, you could spritz them the day of your wedding with rosewater and re-live the love all over again!)

But just remember...the beauty secret of the Goddess of Love is that she keeps her heart open....

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia  

ps: stay in touch for more in this special series on "aromatherapy, brides, and weddings"....

[Photograph: Marianne Taylor, UK]

{The Fragrance of Love}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Aromatherapy experts tell us there is a keen relationship between memory and the sense of smell. So thoughtfully choose the fragrance that you wear on your wedding day as well as the scent of flowers in your bouquet. This could be the scent that always brings back your remembrance of this special day.

And here's an idea for your wedding...set-in a wonderful memory: Before you begin to walk down the aisle, pause. And the moment you see your husband-to-be standing at the other end waiting for you, breathe in a slow, easy breath and let the scent of your bouquet flowers take you deep into your heart...anchoring in the fragrance of love.

Practice now: Take several deeeep, slow inhales with long, relaxing exhales until you feel your heart open. Don't rush....enjoy breathing in and out of your heart and find the sweetness there. Okay, you're ready!

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: One of my favorite books about flowers continues to be the little Kate Greenaway version of Language of Flowers ...sharing the meaning of hundreds of blossoms. And to learn more about aromatherapy and how to use essential oils and fragrance, The Art of Aromatherapy is full of great ideas. Enjoy.

[Photograph: Marla Aufmuth]

{Soothing & Naturally Scented}

Dear Bride-to-Be: 
Do something soothing and fragrant and luxurious for yourself every day while planning your wedding. (I know you're busy, but you can do it! You're worth it.) It can be as simple as keeping aromatherapy candles on hand so you can light one or two and make whatever tasks you're doing -- cleaning house or writing thank you notes or looking at magazines -- a more pleasurable experience with natural fragrances "wafting" about! (It's amazing how something so simple can make such a difference in your well-being.)

Then, when you have some alone private time, take a relaxing bath with calming, fragrant essential oils and herbal bath salts. Light an aromatherapy candle in a favorite scent (or use an essential oil diffuser -- they're a dream!), then close your eyes and take deeeep, slow breaths while you enjoy wherever the soothing quiet takes you.

But you don't have time for a soaking bath and need to get energized fast? For a fragrant, quick pick-me-up anytime of day, spritz rosewater facial mist on your face for a revitalizing refreshment.

There you have it! You can go scent, soak, and spritz away and bring aromatherapy into your wedding planning time for moments of scented pleasure -- whether you need to relax or revitalize. (Plus, it's great practice for taking care of yourself "after the wedding" when you get back to "regular life"!)

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: Stay tuned for more next week in the "brides, weddings, and aromatherapy" series.

[Photograph: April Groom]

{Aromatherapy, Your Heart & You}

Dear Bride-To-Be:
We all love flowers and natural fragrances. And weddings are a chance to surround ourselves with both. During this blog series highlighting “brides, weddings, and aromatherapy,” some of you have asked, “just what is aromatherapy?”

Like the heart of your relationship is love, the heart of aromatherapy is essential oils. Essential oils are the highly concentrated essences of aromatic plants such as flowers, fruits, herbs, seeds, woods, and roots. Aromatherapy is the art of using these oils to take care of your body, mind and spirit...even promoting healing.

And here is what’s so cool: Since smell goes directly into the olfactory of the brain, the body gets an immediate signal to respond to the charms of a scents’ character. For instance, a sniff of chamomile essential oil will have a relaxing effect; while a whiff of rosemary essential oil will enliven. As our bodies become more open and alive -- more sensitive to the pleasures of the world around us -- our hearts are more open to giving and receiving love.

So keep a supply of essential oils in your “wedding planning kit” to use to pamper and take care of all the parts of you! Because as you take care of yourself inside and out, you are nurturing your relationship inside and out as well.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: In future posts, listen out for some deliciously pleasurable aromatic ideas for taking care of you from head to toe! (Missed past aromatherapy posts? Just scroll down and enjoy....)

[Photograph: Marianne Taylor, London]

{Fragrance & Brides}

Dear Bride-to-Be: We all love the subtle fragrances of flowers and the dreamy places their romantic scents seem to take us, yes? Today I’m beginning a series on “brides, weddings, and aromatherapy.” The posts will be full of tips and ideas for being the calm, beautiful, sensuous, and naturally fragrant bride you want to be!

Did you know that fragrance can affect your emotions? Since brides are in the middle of an emotional journey of life adjustment and decision making, inner growth and self-discovery, the right fragrance can help soothe the way to the wedding. Aromatherapists have long suggested using essential oils to treat stress, so what fragrance should a bride wear on her wedding day to feel beautiful and at ease?

“I would recommend citrus and white flowers,” says Eleanor Athens, a pioneer in the world of scents and essential oils. “Fresh citrus scents lower stress levels, and the aroma of tropical blossoms such as jasmine and ylang is both relaxing and euphoric; just how you want to feel on your wedding day.”

Mmmmm....euphoric and relaxing...what an irresistible combination! My friends at Mountain Rose Herbs can assist you with the purest of essential oils (nothing artificial for you!)...and taking some slow, thoughtful breaths deep into your heart will assist you in easing the stress of wedding planning.

Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia

ps: More to come on fragrance and your wedding in my next post...every Wednesday!
pps: My book, The Bride's Ritual Guide: Look Inside To Find Yourself, has more ideas for using essential oils for your wedding...plus lots more tips for your inner & outer beauty! Do you have your copy yet? 

[Photograph: Laura Heffington]